For Kiya and Roy

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Horus
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Horus »

Kiya, the secret of giving up is not for others to stop smoking in your presence (although it does help) but to remove yourself from the smokers when they light up. That is easy to do now with the smoking ban in public places as you do not have to follow someone outside for a smoke. Around home is more difficult, but if both parties can agree not to smoke say in the living room, then it is a good start. The problem with smoking is the social aspect of it, they have a ciggie, so you have a ciggie, there is also the ritual part which is the hardest to break. You know the routine, get up have a cup of tea and a ciggie, leave for work stop for a paper and light up a ciggie, get to work early and make a brew then have a ciggie before you start, lunchtime have something to eat then light up. It is that routine that must be broken and you need to divert your mind away from the cigarette every time by instantly doing something else, eventually the craving will become less it just takes time and will power. I can honestly say that I will never ever smoke again, I have beaten that craving and no way would I ever start again, I treat myself like an alcoholic inasmuch as realising that if I ever touched a cigarette again I could set myself off on the smoking route once more.


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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Grandad »

Kiya wrote:The problem here David didn't stop with her & still smoked around her as did family & friends, I cannot see my sil Jill stopping around him as he didn't around her, a bit selfish I know with David being so ill, time will tell & I'll be watching them :)
My wife didn't stop with me either, not for another year or so. I don't remember that it actually bothered me, I was the one who had the kick up the backside and my incentive was stronger.

Tell David we are routing for him and to give up will add years to his life, he is young to get the benefit. :up

Lung cancer, like heart attacks, don't give any warning but they both have the same cause......
:gg:
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Kiya
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Kiya »

Thanks again :) I will see him tomorrow & try to encourage him more to keep on thinking the way he is....but, you are right H David did say its when after meal times he enjoys his ciggies most & when company is in....you know how it is , all around the table having coffee/tea & natter & of course everyone follows lighting up .
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Grandad »

Kiya wrote:Thanks again :) he enjoys his ciggies most & when company is in....you know how it is , all around the table having coffee/tea & natter & of course everyone follows lighting up .
Oh Kiya I don't wish to offend but I certainly DON'T know how it is. Perhaps people in Scotland smoke more than the rest of the country but the picture you paint is of widespread early demise. You have a big problem there to encourage your circle of friends to stop smoking, good luck with that :up
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

I must say that cigarette smoking here in Canada is definitely TABOO now. I know some people still do smoke but overtly smoking a cigarette is now nothing you ever see. Same with smoking inside a house - that is super taboo.

IMO that is all a positive sign of the times and I'd be more than happy if I never saw or smelled a cigarette again.
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Horus »

It is far better not to smoke, but we have to realise that giving up is not easy for everyone, plus cultural backgrounds don't always help. When I was a kid is was tough to be smoking, after all, our screen heroes did it all the time. ;)
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Grandad »

Absolutely H! For the first half of the 20th century and longer, smoking was both widespread and fashionable. Even manual workers would buy their little green sleeve of five 'Woods' on their way to work.

Tobacco, alcohol and even some prescription medicine CAN become additive. I would never deny how hard it is to give up but I do think there has got to be THE WILL.

Another problem of today is obesity. I am six one and 17 stone which gives a BMI of 35 I think. I need to lose at least two stone but, we eat a very healthy diet with modest portions but still the weight won't come off. I should exercise but can't walk more than a couple of hundred yards. My father and his sisters were all big people so I get it from his side of the family. I would like to lose some weight but, like all the other things I have mentioned, it is not easy.
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Kiya
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Kiya »

@Grandad, I wouldn't say here in Scotland we smoke more than the rest of the country but do admit when in company chatting, coffee, tea etc we do seem to smoke more.....I think its maybe just that sitting down period with company whereas if we were on the go keeping busy we smoke less. :)
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Ruby Slippers »

Kiya, I agree with you 100%. When I'm busy, I forget about smoking, but when I stop for a cuppa or lunch break, the first thing I do is light up! :) What makes it worse is the fact I don't sleep well, and I can't get on with anything until DH is up and doing, so retirement (his) has been purgatory for me! :(
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Grandad »

RS, for some reason I never envisaged you as a smoker. ?
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Horus »

I think that for the reasons already mentioned we have sadly all smoked at one time or another, :( it is the one reason I never criticise or lecture anyone else as I know how hard it can be to quite. :tk
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

Have to say I have NEVER had so much as 1 cigarette - however - as my Mom was a chain smoker I had more than my share of second hand smoke. Some studies say that is worse than first hand smoke but ??
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Kiya »

Well my two weeks with Roy being home has flown by so quickly, he returned to Canada on Monday and would you believe I'm bored already........it was really good to have some time with him. :)

As for bringing home a pressie for Mum.....no chance :( but, he did give me three fridge magnets..... I do like them :)

I was always telling him to go search for a iceberg or at least keep an eye out for ones passing/St.Johns/Newfoundland & send me photos, but, no I got the iceberg on a fridge magnet instead..............better than nothing I suppose :)

Update on David, he is at home now & trying his best to slow down, he was just saying today he was dying to get out in his garden again to cut grass for the last time this year, so far he hasn't.

Smoking YES!!!! he has started again within the first week, I really didn't think he could stop to be honest as I know how much he enjoys his ciggy, but he has cut back a bit...............he knows how disappointed I was with him!
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Horus »

Nice you had some quality time with Roy, fancy him not bringing his mum a prezzie, :( tell him I am most disappointed in him, fridge magnets indeed! :urm:
Glad that David is on the mend, but how really silly that he has not made more effort, you don’t get many warnings in life, but hey ho I suppose we can talk all we want and folks still do what they have always done. :|
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

Good to know that David is on the mend and is home. He'll actually do much better there than anywhere else and maybe with NON STOP NAGGING ;) he'll quit smoking (although probably not).

You know - and this might sound strange - but with any serious addiction you probably can't do it alone. Don't know if you have them there but even if he went to an AA meeting and started following the 12 Steps. I know I'm mixing alcohol and ciggies but an addiction is an addiction is an addiction and the Principles of Recovery are the same. Lots of guys smoke their brains out trying to get off Alcohol but if David could think on the Principles of Recovering from an addiction it might help him.

As for Roy - he is back in Newfie land! Hopefully he is taking photos of his time there.

Go get yourself an Amaryllis for the Great E4U Amaryllis Challenge! ;) :) :)
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Kiya »

I guessed David would start again as there is so many smokes around him, not to worry its on him now :)

Doubt I'll see photos from Roy with doing 12 hour shifts & night shift sometimes, by the end of a 12 hr shift all he wants to do is eat, shower, relax, and sleep :)

Forgot to add ....me ! get an Amaryllis, it would probably die on the first day with me....I'm no green fingers :(
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Re: For Kiya and Roy

Post by Horus »

Forgot to add ....me ! get an Amaryllis, it would probably die on the first day with me....I'm no green fingers :(
They are so easy to grow as its just a bulb and you keep it watered, a bit like a pot of Hyacinths.
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